The Couve Courier operates as the leading independent news source serving the scattered communities between the Columbia River and the former I-5 corridor. Our dedicated team of reporters risks life, limb, and occasional undead encounter to bring verified news to both the walled settlements and outer camp networks.
Despite operating with limited resources, we maintain rigorous journalistic standards. Each story is fact-checked by at least two sources who haven’t succumbed to infection or been caught stealing from trading posts in the past six months.
The Courier accepts payment in the form of shelf-stable food items, ammunition (excluding homemade), and working AA batteries. Our subscription service includes weekly delivery via our network of heavily armed paper carriers, who also moonlight as surprisingly effective information gatherers.
In addition to breaking news, we provide essential community services including:
- Weekly updated threat maps of regional horde movements
- Obituaries (confirmed deaths only – we stopped publishing “presumed eaten” notices due to space constraints)
- Trading post price comparisons
- Classified ads (personal and commercial)
- Survival tips from our network of experts who have yet to die
- Corporate city-camp job listings (reader discretion advised)
Our editorial policies reflect our commitment to journalistic integrity in challenging circumstances. We maintain strict standards for source verification, requiring at least two independent confirmations for any story that doesn’t involve active gunfire or ongoing pursuit. Anonymous sources are accepted only when the informant can provide either tangible evidence or a reasonable quantity of tradeable goods.
The Courier’s editorial board operates under a clear set of guidelines:
- No direct quotations from actively turning individuals
- Equal coverage of all trading posts, regardless of their threats or bribes
- Strict fact-checking of corporate press releases, particularly mortality statistics from job sites
- No publication of unconfirmed settlement collapse rumors
- Fair reporting on inter-camp disputes, provided all parties agree to temporarily cease hostilities against our reporters
- Correction policies that acknowledge both factual errors and cases of mistaken identity between the living, deceased, and undead
The Couve Courier proudly maintains its independence from both corporate city-camp influence and the various scavenger gangs claiming to be “legitimate alternative governments.” Our motto, “News worth the bullet it’s fired from,” reflects our commitment to providing value despite the challenging distribution environment.
We acknowledge certain unavoidable biases, particularly regarding individuals or groups who have previously attempted to raid our offices, eat our staff, or demand retractions at gunpoint. However, our door remains open to all parties willing to maintain basic civility and respect our no-weapons-drawn-during-interviews policy.
For advertising inquiries, news tips, or to report carrier-related casualties, please contact our main office during daylight hours only. Armed escorts are available upon request for a reasonable fee.
Want to know more? Please reach out to us at: [email protected]. We’d love to hear from you!
